It’s Not Exactly Brain Surgery

A poem by Brad Rose


Listen to Brad read the following poem here.

You bring the ladders, I’ll bring the snakes. Like the man said, you’ve got to choose your own adventure. The worst thing that can happen is that nothing happens at all. Of course, I’m not interested in magnets, I’m only interested in magnetism. It’s not a crime, it’s a force of nature. Speaking of deadlines, consider this: if Marilyn Monroe married Marilyn Manson, they’d both be named Marilyn Manson. But that’s unlikely to happen because, from the look of things, one of them is dead already. It’s like fishing and being hooked—both involve fish. I find it’s easier to scoop a smaller portion with a larger spoon, than a larger portion with a smaller spoon, even if February is romance month, and a market correction is expected. The economy is a duck/rabbit illusion, just like the look on your face when you’re looking at something you shouldn’t be looking at, and your wife, in what can only be described as a “domestic incident,” suddenly walks into the room. She may be wearing something diaphanous for the sheer fun of it, but photography is strictly forbidden, especially here in the offline world, where superheroes can’t make a decent living no matter how many lives they save, and the most flattering thing a wife can say to the police about her caped husband is, Sure, he’s safe, but he’s not harmless. (By the way, who said anything about brain surgery?) I’m telling you, if you’re not careful, talk like that can go straight to your head. No sir, these hands aren’t lethal weapons, they’re legal weapons. By the way officer, could you pass me that crowbar, please?

Brad Rose was born and raised in Los Angeles, and lives in Boston. He is the author of Pink X-Ray (Big Table Publishing, 2015.) Twice nominated for a Pushcart Prize in fiction, Brad’s poetry and fiction have appeared in The Los Angeles Times, Folio, decomP, Lunch Ticket, The Baltimore Review, The Midwest Quarterly, San Pedro River Review, Off the Coast, Posit, Third Wednesday, Boston Literary Magazine, Right Hand Pointing, and other publications. Brad is the author of three electronic chapbooks: Democracy of Secrets, Dancing School Nerves, and Coyotes Circle the Party Store . Links to Brad’s published poetry and fiction can be found here. Audio recordings of a selection of his published poetry can be heard here. An interview with Brad is available here.

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